no true luv 4 me....
these few days keep on rainin...weather's very cold...wondering how is 'he' getting on..did he catch a cold? did he wear enuf clothes? did he haf enuf rest? i'm here worryin 4 him... is he worryin 4 me 2? don't think so... the roads r very slippery these few days... hope tat he will ride slowly n safely... hope tat he will take care of his injured finger..
haiz... i'm very dissappointed wif my studies...sometimes i feel like juz givin up... i found out sth last fri...n i m juz very dissapointed wif myself...y didn't i study hard...y didn't i work harder? y muz i let our breakup affect my studies...i keep thinkin, mayb it cld b mine...mayb not 1st but at least 3rd....haiz...i feel like shoutin out my feelings but i cant...cant let my sch mates c all these... i feel so stress...its all bottled up inside me...i wish i cld tell 'him' my feelings... how my tis result sux...i wish i cld cry, cry in his arms... but its impossible... i dun wana keep all tis within me...
these few days, alot of ppl haf been tellin me abt true luv...wat exactly is true luv i wonder? wat does it mean? does it exist? if it do exist... y doesn't it happen on me? 1 of my fren msg me tis mornin...
tis r some of wat he say:
--> u r a cool n amazing gal, u sure can do it de,n u will find ur true luv eventually n i noe he will b loving u deeply
-->true luv do exist de. dun lose trust in luv. u'll haf a nice guy de, as u r very sweet, understanding n lovely lady.. if u really lose trust in true luv, when true luv arrive, it cant b detected
-->dun blame urself 4 the ending of the relationship. u r a sweet gal. 4 e last time i saw u in institute, the impression u gave is nice n sweet
-->i use 2 dun trust luv 2. but now i choose not 2 distrust but believe luv is in the air
yeah...mayb he is rite...but i guess its 4 him n the others... it wont happen 2 me. true luv wont b 4 me... i've no share in it. it's in the air but it has been blown away. how do i feel true luv, where do i find true luv? "he" is the only 1 tat cld make me stop cryin but "he" is also the 1 tat make me cry...i'm waitin 4 him....4 my true luv... but "he" doesn't noe tat i'm waitin 4 him. guess even if he noes tat i'm waitin 4 him, he wont even gif a damn abt me rite.... haha stupid me.. y m i so naive? y?y?y? y muz i believe there is true luv... there is no such thing as true luv tat is goin 2 happen 2 me... there wont b miracles...i'm such a stupid idiotic fool... i'm so useless... y muz i miss him so much? its him, him,him....its kelvin....its kelvin tat i'm missin....
The Only One...